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New York, USA

For years I didn't like New York. I was 6 the first time I was there. It was also my first trip outside of Asia. Winter is so unforgivingly cold that I soon developed a fever on the trip. I fought hard to recover before our flight back home, only to be left stranded with my dad since we were standby passengers. I was devastated watching Mom leave us, as she had to work on the flight back to Hong Kong. Suffice to say, New York traumatized me. Over the years, New York only grew on me the older I got. I began to appreciate the complex dynamics in the city; learning about its changes over the years (search up Times Square's history!); the really cool outfits New Yorkers flaunt and strut in; the breakfast bagels and hot chocolate on every street corner, AND the BEST kebab + fries meal I have ever had, hands down. New York food carts are a culture. The feeling I get just being in Times Square is always an experience - the sensory overload that overwhelms - the occasional blast of wind from the subway shafts, the buskers with amazing voices who are often passed and overlooked by many rushing to get somewhere, the fright of seeing one of the world's largest rats pass by you, the huge, flashing Broadway ads. New York towers over you to make you feel small. But to walk through New York, you'd feel so big, like you were on top of the world. There's constant awe in all that comes at you - but also a deep ache in your gut when you notice those the big Apple marginalizes the most.

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the chats and stories from cab drivers / Broadway shows, especially Dear Evan Hansen!! / the evangelists on the streets urging you to repent / the bike ride across Brooklyn bridge / burger + shakes on every corner / street artists / mascots / the occasional scammer who'd swear at you as you walk past them / the general feeling of inadequacy walking by professionals on Wall Street / the joy in pointing out the many spots in the city where Friends or Spider-Man or Home Alone were filmed at / the huge board with postings of missing people in Target & Walmart always leave me with a heavy heart /

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